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01 May 2010

Seungri: “I felt like I was standing naked in front of the public…”

After debuting as a part of Big Bang, Seungri was so happy that it almost seemed like a dream. But he soon experienced a ‘slump’ too.

“From some point in time, I found that I couldn’t control my facial expressions on broadcasts. I hated having to smile when I was feeling pissed, and being serious when I was really happy…”

Seungri was at that age where he should've been expressing the passion of your youth while going through both positive and negative experiences in order to mature. Being trapped in a square box called the television, he started feeling frustrated.
He started showing his true feelings whenever he was asked an uncomfortable question or put in a situation that angered him.

“I was insanely scolded by G-Dragon. I cried my eyes out afterwards. Why couldn’t I even show what I was feeling? Cos it was my job? I said I couldn’t do it anymore.”

President Yang Hyun Seok approached Seungri during his hardest time and reasoned with him.
“If you can’t even control yourself, how are you going to move the hearts of others?”

Seungri realised that his seniors were right. And after that, broadcasts became a lot more comfortable for him. Even when an awkward question or uncomfortable situation was thrown at him, he learned to pass it off wittily.

“I try not to repeat my mistakes.”

Life in the entertainment industry is full of trouble and scandal. Even after that, there were so many more difficulties for Seungri to overcome.

“Rumours are a terrifying thing in the entertainment industry. For example, I’m friends with Goo Hara right? Then the rumours spread like ‘I heard they’re friends-> I heard they had lunch together -> I heard they went on a date -> I heard they went on a trip together -> I heard they’ve been…you know.’ I think people are mentally wired to exaggerate when they’re telling people stuff. It terrifies me. That’s why I never talk about my problems.”

Even when he has concerns, Seungri says he can’t tell anyone about them. Could the bright, confident side of him that we usually see possibly be a protective mask hiding his true nature and self?

“That’s the way to survive in the entertainment industry. A long time ago, I let out my concerns to someone I was close to. Afterwards I said ‘I would like it if you didn’t tell anyone, hyung’. But the next day, someone else came up to me and said ‘Cheer up, kid.’ In that moment I really felt like I was standing naked in front of everyone.”

He didn’t want to show everything on the inside to the countless people around him. The fear celebrities have of having their personal lives exposed to the public is almost unimaginable.

“I want to be clothed in front of the public. I think I realised that a young age. I have to approach people from the heart but sometimes I find myself thinking ‘This person’s just trying to get to me’, there are even times when I act like a machine to others.”

Seungri is often torn between his real self and the image he shows to the public.

“I’m the youngest, right. So sometimes I have to do things that the others can't. When we meet producers I have to act cute and I have to do certain things on broadcasts too, because I’m the youngest. But I’m just thankful that I’m able to be here with the others.

And I also think that I need to improve more. I’m sure there’s a reason why people like cellphones that have lots of functions as opposed to one that can only call and text. I think I have to be an all-rounder too.”

Source: Original Article
Translated by sjay.x @ BBVIP.net

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